Dont forget to put your clocks forward

I'm losing an hour of sleep!! I am a night hawk, always have been.. always will be. That in turn means I'm so not a morning person. So when the evening comes I come alive and end up staying up too late, thus perpetuating the non morning person cycle. So now that we have to put our clocks ahead I am forced to lose another precious hour of sleep.

Today it rained, which means that spring is coming... I enjoy spring because it brings me that much closer to summer. I wont go into a long dramatic story of how spring brings everything alive etc etc I'm sure we can all figure that out ( Ill live the rest to the poets). For me spring was supposed to be alot of things.. and for right now its not any of those things. I accept where I am, and believe strongly in my heart that where I am is just a part of a journey that I must take. Someday I know that I will write a blog that will reflect back on the months past and realize that God knows more then I do and the whole time was holding me in his hand while I walked through this valley. Today I'm grateful to be sane.. there have been days that it has been hard to put one foot in front of the other, and to be able to just get out of bed and face the world. I have come along way from that place. I'm now back at work and things are going OK.. I'm not feeling extremely passionate about it.. but things will return to balance in time.

People may not look at me and think that much has changed in my life, but I can tell you that my heart is a completely different place then it was 2 months ago. Its amazing how certain life experiences can take you through dark places and bring you out the other side richer. I wish I could skip the spring, because its a season that I want to forget this year.. but I cant do that I have to do just as I have done all along I have to walk through each day- or as my mom would have said "take one day at a time". Time stands still when you want it to go fast, and time goes fast when you wish it could go slow. That is a universal truth I have come to see, but no matter how fast or slow time does march on and with it things get better. I wanted to have my first mothers day this year with a new baby, and while that wont happen this year, I believe that God has a special plan and that in his perfect time I will get that wish. Until then I will continue to put one foot in front of the other and step forward in faith.